The Black Curtain Club
Weird mysteries, creepy stories, chaotic 2 a.m. conversations, and all the things you're afraid to ask your friend - that’s what you’ll find at The Black Curtain Club.
The Black Curtain Club
Cryptid Roommate Roulette: Who Would You Choose?
Imagine having to choose a supernatural roommate from a lineup of legendary cryptids. Would you go with the reliable Bigfoot who fixes everything and brings home free firewood? Maybe Mothman's ability to predict disasters and text you "don't go to Costco today" seems appealing?
In this wildly entertaining crossover episode, we're joined by the crew from the Time Pals podcast for a game of "Cryptid Roommate Roulette." As their self-appointed real estate agent, Angi presents five thoroughly researched (and completely fabricated) cryptid tenant applications, complete with credit scores, rental histories, and household habits.
The conversation takes hilarious turns as we debate which monsters would make good drinking buddies, game night companions, and how they'd handle household disputes. Our Time Pals guests bring their signature humor as they weigh important roommate qualities like Chupacabra's aggressive bug elimination skills and Jersey Devil's tendency to assert dominance by peeing in the laundry room.
By the end, each guest makes their roommate selection, revealing surprising insights about their own living preferences and personality. Whether you're Team Bigfoot or Team Mothman, this episode will have you laughing while contemplating which supernatural entity you'd be willing to split the rent with.
Listen now, and then tell us on social media: which cryptid would YOU choose as a roommate?
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Which one gives out raccoons. Which one gives out raccoons? Which one's domesticating raccoons?
Speaker 2:That was Bigfoot, wasn't it? That was Bigfoot. Bigfoot's got the army of raccoons.
Speaker 1:He's just going to show up like Christoph from Frozen, but instead of little rock trolls, it's a bunch of fucking raccoons.
Speaker 3:I mean, I'm not against that.
Speaker 2:Bigfoot being down for game night. He'd be down for game night.
Speaker 3:Likes. He likes a good.
Speaker 4:Uno game.
Speaker 1:I feel like if he's like hipsters, it's going to be like he used a CNC set to create his own rare wood version of Settlers of Catan that he wants you to play on.
Speaker 2:The Oregon Trail, the board game. Before we begin today's episode, we would like to share a quick disclaimer. The views, opinions and statements expressed by the hosts and guests on this podcast are their own personal views and are provided in their own capacity. All content is editorial, opinion-based and intended for entertainment purposes only. Listener discretion is advised. Welcome back, weirdos, to another episode of Black Curtain Club, where things go bump in the night and probably don't pay rent. This is Angie with my ride-or-die leather-clad co-host Kyle, and joining us tonight are some very special guests from the Time Pals podcast. A couple months ago, we made a ghostly appearance on their podcast and now they're in our realm and they're here to learn about a problem they didn't know that they had. So, with that, how is everyone, and do you want to take some time to introduce yourselves to our listeners and talk about your podcast?
Speaker 5:Yeah, so this is Mike underscore, producer and co-host of the time pals. And before anything else, madam, I will have you know that I'm drinking from a novelty plastic wine glass in the shape of a skull right now, so there is no way this bullshit you're going to try to throw at us is going to affect me in any way. Nothing is scarier in this moment than a bunch of haunted dinosaurs. I'm just telling you so. My three little time pals are four geek dads. We're the Time Pals, our four geek dads. We decided to squander our midlife crisis by diving headfirst into podcasting versus actually doing something constructive like barbecuing or beer making or, in the case of Mr McBeardface, doing anything manly whatsoever. But the other three that usually join me? There's John Powell and there's Nickel, and then we have somebody who's not here with us today, which is Shadows Garden. I want to throw it back to one of my co-hosts, the lovely, handsome John Powell.
Speaker 3:Oh, thank you, I'll take that. Yeah, speaking of bumping the night last night I definitely went bumping the night because I slammed my curse on this podcast.
Speaker 1:For the love of God, just don't say fuck or cunt or twat or shit.
Speaker 3:Oh, okay, Because I was going to say I hit my shit on that fucking cunt of a bed frame of mine.
Speaker 2:You survived.
Speaker 5:Yes, I did. Are you done, John? No, never.
Speaker 3:Until you take it from me violently. Damn it you done, john. We have no, never until you take it from me violently and then excuse me, I apologize for that.
Speaker 5:So the other that came with us today is nickel. He's basically the creative whore. He's a creative whore behind the podcast. He's a creative horse behind the Time Pals and his name is Nick.
Speaker 1:I love creative horse.
Speaker 4:Thank you for having me. I'm the creative whore. I guess I do this instead of going to therapy.
Speaker 2:Valid, very valid.
Speaker 1:Therapy is expensive.
Speaker 5:Alcohol is cheap Nickle is Irish.
Speaker 2:There you go, you go, there you go oh I'm sorry, it's scottish. I'm sorry.
Speaker 3:I believe in fact, you were at your, your people's festival this weekend, nickel, it's all.
Speaker 5:So, as a brown person, it to be fair, you guys all look alike.
Speaker 1:As a brown person.
Speaker 3:He's very racially ambiguous.
Speaker 2:This is true. Well, I'm so glad you guys have joined us. We're going to have a lot of fun, I can tell so, with that. Oh, I guess I should ask Kyle, how are you?
Speaker 1:Oh, I'm here. Yeah, no, you're here, you know know, I'm just here, I'm just, I'm just here.
Speaker 2:so I don't get sued. Well, to be honest, I have a game of sorts for you guys that I have now lovingly called this uh, cryptid roommateate Roulette.
Speaker 1:Wait a minute. I thought we were going to turn the lights off and play who's in my Mouth. Is this the wrong episode?
Speaker 2:This is a very wrong episode.
Speaker 1:Ah, shit, alright, my bad.
Speaker 5:We'll do that for Christmas. I'm just gonna know who it is.
Speaker 2:So the rules of this game are pretty simple. Um, you have a spare room that you're going to rent out and I, as your real estate agent, have narrowed it down to five potential candidates. I've done the research, the background checks, um, and by the end of this you'll have to choose one roommate. And just so you know, these are real files, completely confidential. They're deeply unverified and absolutely paranormal. So with that we're going to start out with the first one, who I've I've labeled candidate privacy loving handyman with composting opinions.
Speaker 2:This is otherwise known as bigfoot, his, his last rental history includes, uh, homes in places in the pacific, northwest, in the appalachians, and basically wherever the trail goes is where he typically ends up. Um, he prefers to pay his rent in cash, but it's always in a flannel envelope. He occasionally barters with stacked firewood. As as far as his credit score, his credit score is kind of off-grid, but he does have very, very outstanding references from three park rangers and a very earnest Cabela's cashier. So some of his pros are that he loves to fix everything doors, outlets, the weird hum in the refrigerator. He is a yard work machine. He, you know, like mulch will just appear like forest magic. Um, he is that cannon for bigfoot.
Speaker 5:Is that something like?
Speaker 1:he goes to hollow earth to get it.
Speaker 5:Okay, Okay, Go go ahead. I'm sorry, I just I'm like when did this become a big foot?
Speaker 2:He's um good as a deterrent to like porch pirates and influencers. He's good at reaching top shelves, but the cons are that you will have hair everywhere. The shower drain literally becomes its own cryptid.
Speaker 2:He has a tendency to track pine needles and size 26 footprints across the rug. And he also will not participate in your roommate TikToks your podcast anything, because he values mystery. His work history is that he is a seasonal trail maintenance person plus a wilderness guide. He side hustles selling ethically forged mushrooms and artisanal walking sticks. He does convention appearances for fees in October and that's pretty much it for his employment history. Some of his habits include he likes to have coffee at dawn on the balcony. He's very silent. He does like the ferment things like kombucha, sauerkraut and a specialty he calls swamp tea. He also likes to stack stones for vibes and I will tell you that he's had some HOA disputes over the stones. He has a house rule that no trail cams are allowed in the inside of the home, not even ironically. Another thing that puts him kind of in the green flag category is that he can really help you rearrange your furniture. He can lift a couch solo. He loves to label things in hex key and again, he brings home free firewood.
Speaker 1:So he's from Portland.
Speaker 5:God, he's just any dude from Portland I was going to say the same thing Any dude from Portland.
Speaker 1:Everything you've read is just anyone's resume.
Speaker 5:If you just throw a stone in Seattle, you will find this person. I swear to fucking Christ, just walk around. We're on the West Coast. You have no idea how accurate this is right now. Coast. You have no idea how accurate this is right now.
Speaker 2:The only other red flag that he has is that he loves to domesticate raccoons, and he does have a raccoon that's with him all the time, named Douglas.
Speaker 1:Wait, how is that a red flag?
Speaker 4:That's green flag all the way.
Speaker 2:That's green flag. Okay, can I?
Speaker 4:already pick Bigfoot.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the kombucha is all the way. That's green flag. Okay, can I already pick Bigfoot? Yeah, the kombucha is the kombucha is the red flag.
Speaker 4:Yeah, that's the red flag Kombucha.
Speaker 5:Is his cosign still the six million dollar man? I love a good kombucha. There is no way. You drink kombucha.
Speaker 3:I have like a six pack in the fridge right now. Turn on your camera.
Speaker 5:Show me the car facts. There is no way you drink kombucha. I have like a six pack in the fridge right now.
Speaker 4:Moving on. Turn on your camera. It's like show me the car facts.
Speaker 2:All right, so our next one is the anxious safety inspector who is? Otherwise known as Mothman Mothman, is obviously from West Virginia. Mothman Mothman is obviously from West Virginia and although he has rental history worldwide, he pretty much has always been a West Virginia resident as far as the way he pays his rent and his credit score, so he does always pay on time. He prefers to pay by Venmo. He prefers to pay by Venmo and his credit score is 780, but it will dip down to like 420 every time a disaster is foretold.
Speaker 1:Define disaster because like a disaster's credit score or like 9-11? It's all bridge related.
Speaker 2:Right, it's all bridge related yeah, some of his pros include that he's a night owl. He really kind of acts as your own personal security cam. He notices every creak, every leak, every wire that seems to be illegal. He's going to catch it. He has foldable wings, so he's kind of like a free box van for the living room. So he's kind of like a free box fan for the living room and, uh, he brings his own red mood lighting to any situation with his eyes, whether you want him to or not whether you want him to or not.
Speaker 2:So that could be a con if you're not really into mood lighting. Uh, the con is he is foreboding about everything the toaster, aquariums, just a random Tuesday, Everything's foreboding. He has a tendency to shed shimmering feathers and you know he cries at the vacuum cleaner.
Speaker 5:He sounds like every Italian mother-in-law.
Speaker 1:It's the shimmering feathers, isn't it?
Speaker 5:It's the shimmering feathers. My wife is half Italian, half Mexican. This is so close to what I already lived with.
Speaker 3:I use the plastic covered furniture.
Speaker 5:You know, everything harms, like some saint you've ever heard of.
Speaker 2:He's a freelance omen consultant and which has like seasonal surge pricing around infrastructure, so he makes a decent living definitely um some of his habits are that he likes to perch on the refrigerator to watch the weather.
Speaker 2:He doesn't stay in one place for too long, so he may be a short-term resident. One of his house rules that he'll fight for is no unsolicited bridge talk at dinner or really any time. No bridge talk, no bridge. Some of the other things that he has going for him is that he's very good at returning your tupperware. He will text you don't go to costco today, and every time, 10 out of 10. He's always right. He's always right about costco, okay, um, he's really good at finding lost things, uh, especially keys, for some reason, and he's very punctual, if not a little early, for important events, and he loves to be part of historical events. Former landlords say that he has a tendency to stare at light fixtures for long hours and he's consistently muttering cryptic messages under his breath, like don't go to work tomorrow. He brings pigeons home just to talk to them, and one of his roommates did unfortunately go missing after ignoring a prophecy.
Speaker 1:So that's candidate mothman I mean fuck a boot and find it son. You know what I mean. I just I don't know why, but you said the thing about sitting on the. I literally just pictured like an eight foot fucking moth just isn't he really big? Yeah, he's huge I just, I literally just pictured mothman like I had a family guy cutaway scene in my head. I was just like go to get like milk at like 2 am and I just opened the fridge door and mothman's just there just perched.
Speaker 5:To be fair, I've also just randomly told people I don't like they're gonna die that day, just in the hope that when it happens it feels like I actually did something.
Speaker 2:I actually put something in the universe. Are you Mothman?
Speaker 5:No, no, but every now and again when Nickel's annoying, I'm like Nickel, this is it for you.
Speaker 4:Yep, yep. And then I sign my will over to you every time, but I never end up dying.
Speaker 5:No, he's a survivor.
Speaker 1:Oh, you know what I started.
Speaker 2:You beat me by like five seconds, so the next one that we have is the chaotic cousin who knows a guy. Does anybody want to take a guess at who this candidate is?
Speaker 4:It's got to be the chupacabra.
Speaker 2:No, dang, it Dang it.
Speaker 4:I took a guess. Nobody else took a guess. You were strong, you were strong.
Speaker 2:That was with conviction, yeah.
Speaker 5:What about, like that bad omens are happening for you, my friend?
Speaker 3:Oh, okay, alright, I'll talk to my lawyer tomorrow and I'll get more money sent over to you, Mike, I think I only know one other cryptid than the two we've done and the one that Nickel just shouted yeah, the Jersey Devil is the only other. Nickel just shouted yeah, the Jersey Devil is the only other one I know.
Speaker 2:Bing, bing, bing. This is it, the Jersey Devil. Yeah, the Jersey Devil.
Speaker 4:Of course, because he knows a guy Of all the guests. He knows a guy.
Speaker 3:I didn't even link it to that. I'm just like. I only know one more. Let's see if it's that. I know a guy. I didn't even link it to that. I'm just like. I only know one more. Let's see if it's that, oh, dang it.
Speaker 1:He knows a guy Come on, good guess what. You got some disaster going down, I'll take care of it. I know a guy, don't worry about it. Forget about it Fell off a truck.
Speaker 4:So his location, history, people in southwestern United States and Mexico, they know people too. I'm just saying you know, chupacabra wasn't a bad guess.
Speaker 2:Moving on. So his location, history is, you know, obviously the Pine Barrens, and also he has been known to live in just about every Wawa parking lot.
Speaker 1:Have you been to?
Speaker 2:Wawa.
Speaker 5:Have you been to?
Speaker 1:Jersey recently. What's?
Speaker 5:a Wawa. I don't know what that is. We're from.
Speaker 1:California. It's like Northeast Buc-ee's, but it sucks.
Speaker 3:I love Buc-ee's so much.
Speaker 4:Yeah, but you know what?
Speaker 1:Buc-ee's is though right.
Speaker 5:Yes, I drive out of my way.
Speaker 3:I drive out of my way by about 45 minutes every time I go to either Dallas or Austin just to go to Buc-ee's and stock up.
Speaker 1:I love Buc-ucky's so much.
Speaker 3:Beaver Nuggets for the win? Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 2:So he will pay rent in crisp $10 bills that always smell faintly of hoagies and his credit score is amazingly 666. And he claims it's quote unquote on brand. So some of his pros are that he can parallel park anything, including your feelings. He knows every shortcut, every toll hack, every gas station that has good ice. He's very protective. If someone takes your parking spot they will hear hooves. He has been banned in 12 different apartment complex for noise complaints, fire damage and general demonic ambience complaints, fire damage and general demonic ambience.
Speaker 1:but I put this in the pro because generally your neighbors will leave you alone if he's your roommate, okay, so everything that he's been kicked out for are we're still talking about the devil, or just anyone from like atlantic city, like anyone from like south jersey.
Speaker 2:I'm pretty sure you've just read their dossier so some of his cons are that you will have to get used to hearing hoof clatter at 3 am. He has a tendency to pace when he's brainstorming, so just, you're just gonna have to get used to the hooves. There is an occasional tail singe on curtains. Um, he calls it pine baron's patina. He does enjoy loud sports. He has loud opinions about sports. He will boo the flyers and he also really hates just the concept of new york well, yeah, he does we expect.
Speaker 2:He's from jersey. His side hustles include regional cryptid, merch haunted tour cameos and consulting, but we don't really know what that means. He does have a very sketchy rental history, but he is pretty wealthy. He doesn't really have any house rules that he'll fight for, he just likes to hang, and so Some of his other green flags is that he's always up to drive you to the airport at 430 and he will scare off the line cutters for you. He knows how to throw a good house party. He always has the right connections for everything Liquor runs, firewood, purse, jewelry, concert tickets. He literally knows everyone and, fun fact, he's surprisingly good at trivia nights interesting and then, uh, he does insist that you call him sir.
Speaker 2:Um, he has a tendency to screech when he's hungry. He will not stop vaping. It tends to be some form of banana menthol, and it has a tendency to make everyone sick.
Speaker 4:Banana menthol.
Speaker 1:Anyone from Jersey Got it Done?
Speaker 3:Is banana menthol a real thing?
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I don't know. Probably I think they put menthol with anything. He does have a tendency to assert his dominance by peeing in the laundry room and he will bring his exes over at 2am and they always end in some kind of cultist seance. So that is your candidate four. I think that's candidate four. No, that's candidate three.
Speaker 1:That's number three.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so the next one that we have, the outdoorsy minimalist Also. Do not follow into the woods. Anyone want to take a guess of who this candidate is?
Speaker 4:Well, it already like is this not the other? Like southern Bigfoot type? What is it? The carry ape or whatever they call it?
Speaker 1:The skunk ape.
Speaker 2:Oh, the skunk ape, skunk ape. Yeah, no, you can't have two skunk apes in one podcast.
Speaker 5:They call it the Skunk Ape, skunk Ape, yeah, skunk Ape, no, skunk Ape, dang it God.
Speaker 4:I'm 0 for 2, but I'm the only one guessing.
Speaker 5:You are embarrassing the time out.
Speaker 3:I don't know any other ones. Okay, here I'll guess Is Nessie a cryptid?
Speaker 4:Nessie is a cryptid but no, Don't follow her into the woods because she lives in the lake. You dummy.
Speaker 3:I don't know, man, I literally don't know cryptids.
Speaker 5:Reread the explanation again or the description again.
Speaker 2:The outdoorsy. Minimalist. Do not follow into the woods.
Speaker 5:I don't know Minimalist is throwing me off, just type it into the chat GBT.
Speaker 1:Which could this be?
Speaker 4:Is it like a fae or a fairy? No, not a siren.
Speaker 1:No, that's more water and they're.
Speaker 3:Europeans More water, dominic, this is fun. We're not going until they guess this is fun. No, that's more water, and they're.
Speaker 2:Europeans.
Speaker 3:More water dummy. What about no?
Speaker 4:this is fun.
Speaker 1:We're not going until they guess this is fun.
Speaker 3:Is the Yeti just a different name for Bigfoot?
Speaker 4:No, this is a mountain goat dummy. No.
Speaker 1:The Yetis are different from Bigfoot. Bigfoot and Sasquatch they are of. They're like a Same species, different race, if you will.
Speaker 3:Okay, I give up, don't follow me to the forest.
Speaker 4:I mean, like what the Just tell us If anyone's Okay.
Speaker 1:Last hint, last hint. How much knowledge do any of you have with the Witcher, the games, specifically?
Speaker 3:I know that it is a game.
Speaker 5:You've all played it right.
Speaker 4:I've played it.
Speaker 1:What's the one that looks like a Leshen? A? What now? The cryptid that looks like the Leshen or the Lechi?
Speaker 3:Oh, I thought dolce de leche.
Speaker 1:No, not dolce de leche no, not a cake it's tres leche tres leche is the cake tres leche is the cake dolce de leche.
Speaker 4:I don't think you guys are going to guess it. No.
Speaker 5:I don't think so. No, we're not. I'm not going to do it. I would have to end my book.
Speaker 2:Okay, so this is the Wendigo.
Speaker 1:Oh the.
Speaker 4:Wendigo Act like you know what the fuck that is.
Speaker 3:I do know what it is because it's a character from Marvel Comics. It's an X-Men.
Speaker 4:No the RV, the RV right. It's a character from.
Speaker 5:Marvel Comics no the RV. The.
Speaker 4:Winnebago Lone.
Speaker 1:Star. That's what Lone Star is A barf road found on a Wendigo.
Speaker 2:So Wendigo is from the deep north. We're talking, like you know. Montana, that's the witcher connection, the antlers in the skull. Yeah, kyle, did you know this one? You didn't guess, but you sounded like you knew what this one was oh yeah, I know how do you know you did. I kept this from you. How did you know?
Speaker 1:I know all.
Speaker 2:I know all you know all. Okay. So the Wendigo likes to pay his rent very early and he says it's so hunger doesn't sneak up on him. He is frostbitten or he is frostbitten. His credit score is frostbitten but it's improving. He likes to attend boundaries and snack groups and he feels like that's going to help him improve his credit score. Question what is a?
Speaker 1:snack group how do we find them? Yeah, it's like book club, which is we all that hard?
Speaker 2:up yeah for friends that we're gonna base everything around snacks snacks right, I am down I mean so some of his pros are he keeps the fridge organized by the lunar phase. He likes to set the thermostat to free Arctic AC. In the summer it's bliss, but in the winter it's absolutely terrible. Depends on how you personally run in your temperature. But he is great at maintaining your hiking gear. Your boots will never look as waxed. He's just great at hiking hiking gear, he's. He's excellent at survival kits. He always has a car scraper and he uh is metaphorically always accountable for everything that he does. Um, some of his cons are that his intermittent ominous whispers about gnawing cravings usually for trail mix, but you still never know. He insists on keeping the freezer full of emergency meat substitutes and he startles very easily if somebody says DoorDash.
Speaker 1:Define meat substitute? You mean like the vegan bullshit where it's like soybean bullshit, or is it like a human liver, like I need to know what substitute meat we're having I don't know, it's just that he just has an emergency at all angie an emergency.
Speaker 2:This doesn't make sense at all. Angie, he's trying to become a better person okay. This is where the madness ends. He does work as a ranger, a park guide, in peak season, and he does sell ethically sourced pinecone art, cone art.
Speaker 3:So he's not all bad that just makes me think of when we made pine cone bird feeders in school.
Speaker 5:I'm not sure if they mean the. The art is on the pine cone or they use the pine cone in the art and both of them are terrible, in my brain.
Speaker 3:I mean why not Pineapples, jesus Christ?
Speaker 2:He meal preps protein bars and he labels them as not a metaphor. He likes to sit by windows during snowstorms like a Victorian with scurvy. Yes, because, wendy.
Speaker 1:Go Right, Wendy. Go during snowstorms like a victorian was scurvy.
Speaker 5:Yes, that is windy, go right leather daddy is on them right now. Leather daddy's right. God damn it. My other time. Pals are slacking. You guys should have thought of Wendy. Go Wendy.
Speaker 2:Go. The last thing about him is that he does have a rule and he says that no late-night true crime cannibal episodes, because he's in recovery, seems fair.
Speaker 5:Fair, that's great, fair, that's great.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I like it. These are good these are real good.
Speaker 2:All right, so the very last one is the HOA's least favorite pet owner and any guesses Ash Ketchum from Pokemon.
Speaker 1:Very close, very close, actually scary close, and by scary close I mean not even.
Speaker 4:I'm not going to guess because, no, maybe you should. Yeah, you should.
Speaker 2:I think you should, I think you should, I think you should say one of the answers you've already said before.
Speaker 4:Oh, goddammit, go ahead, mike. No, I'm trying to remember what you said.
Speaker 5:I'm trying to remember what you said, but I'm like four Dos Equis in and I barely got it.
Speaker 3:The only reason why I want to say that it's the Chupacabra is because I feel like on the side he's a cockfighter. It's the Chupacabra.
Speaker 2:He drinks the blood of Chupacabra. It's the chupacabra I don't have a chupacabra.
Speaker 1:We're right. My last ditch effort of a hint for them was to really test and see if they listen to our podcast. I wouldn't say that Mothman went to their quinceañera, that is very true.
Speaker 2:Oh, I do love a quince.
Speaker 5:You're going to be right eventually.
Speaker 2:Yeah right. So, as we know, the Chupacabra is Southwest Latin America, but he has been banned from three petting zoos. He does pay his rent, um, but he does request a small livestock fee waiver. His? His credit score is unclear, um, but he had an identity theft, uh, due to an alias of goat sommelier.
Speaker 5:Nice.
Speaker 2:There's only one person that knows what a sommelier is.
Speaker 5:I know, I know.
Speaker 3:Wait, wait, wait. You're talking about the wine person.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I thought, it was the candlestick from Beauty and the.
Speaker 1:Beast. No, no, on the West Coast we pronounce it sommelier. Yeah, I thought it was the candlestick from Beauty and the Beast.
Speaker 5:No, no, on the west coast we pronounce it sommelier yeah, it's a sommelier honestly.
Speaker 3:I'm just dumb, so. I thought those were pirates of sommelier yeah, exactly, I am the captain now, guys, right?
Speaker 5:in West Virginia, where they apparently don't drink wine.
Speaker 1:They said drinking corn liquor out there, wine's for the fucking week, or they're not as pretentious.
Speaker 5:There are better people. Salt of the earth.
Speaker 3:Real salt of the earth.
Speaker 2:Note to self it's a say it again, sommelier.
Speaker 4:Sommelier.
Speaker 1:Like the Girl Scout cookie.
Speaker 5:No, no, no, Think of it, that's Sommelier the wrestlers.
Speaker 4:Sommelier Joe.
Speaker 5:Took over Captain Phillips' ship and then go yay, and that's Somalia.
Speaker 1:Somalia.
Speaker 2:God damn it, alright. Well, no more wine jokes. That was my last and only wine joke that I'll ever do in my life.
Speaker 4:Yeah, way to get us kicked off of the podcast. Mike, I'm sorry.
Speaker 5:Can we still guess? Chupacabra Can we still guess?
Speaker 2:chupacabra. So he is a keto chef. He makes a mean adobo. He's very loyal.
Speaker 4:Mike, this is your thing, man.
Speaker 2:If you're threatened, he will hiss like a pressure cooker.
Speaker 1:Hopefully not one from Boston.
Speaker 2:He doesn't like to handle any and all bug problems and he's very aggressive about it. So some of the cons is that his last neighborhood, all of the goats unionized against him, all of the goats unionized against him, and he likes to keep quote unquote. Hydration pouches in the fridge. They're always labeled as such, but they are this weird kind of reddish pinkish color and he blames crop circles for missed chore days.
Speaker 1:The goats unionized against him. Watch out for the super cover. He's bad news.
Speaker 4:Oh Jesus, what the fuck.
Speaker 2:Slow clap, slow, slow clap. Thank you.
Speaker 1:Thank you very much. I'll see myself out.
Speaker 2:Bad news. So he works as a night shift.
Speaker 5:Phlebotomist.
Speaker 2:Clever, so yeah, don't worry too much about it. Plus, he also does cameo shout outs. That's his work, history.
Speaker 3:Did you say phlebotomist or lobotomist? Lobotomist.
Speaker 2:Lobotomist, phlebotomist, phlebotomist. Oh okay, some of his habits are he likes to sleep in the tub for the acoustics and he collects shiny bottle caps like dragon treasure. Oh okay, and some of his house rules are that do not shame him for garlic, it's a cultural thing and do not come for him over it.
Speaker 3:Defund, nevermind, nope, nope, nope, leaving it, leaving it, nope.
Speaker 5:Beerzy, beerzy, don't go down.
Speaker 2:Nope, nope, nope, nope. Yep, I worded that wrong.
Speaker 1:Yep, we're just going to let that happen.
Speaker 2:And he likes to introduce himself to goats as their biggest fan. So that's it. That's the last candidate.
Speaker 5:So, we're all discussing all of them at once? Are we going back and doing each one individually?
Speaker 2:so you can, you know, go and tell us who you think your roommate choice would be, and and why okay, hold on, I have.
Speaker 4:I have one really big question. Okay, shoot, that I think will apply. It applies to all candidates. Okay, that might help you guys also make your decision. So can you quickly walk us through any habits or any enjoyments they might take, like do they drink? Do they smoke? When they drink or smoke, what do they do?
Speaker 1:I have no idea why, but when you started your question, I thought you were going to go. Can you fuck them? I don't know why. Nope, I don't. I thought you were going to go. Can you fuck them.
Speaker 4:I don't know why I don't know why you're gonna no. No, it's a really important question when you're thinking about a roommate like fair.
Speaker 1:That I mean also, it's not up to her.
Speaker 3:if we can fuck them, they have their own say yeah, right.
Speaker 5:It's got to be consensual.
Speaker 4:Yeah, everyone has their own autonomy.
Speaker 5:We're not here to yuck anybody's yum.
Speaker 4:But, as the describer of our roommates, can you tell us if they drink or if they smoke or, you know, do other things maybe? Maybe bigfoot takes shrooms, whatever.
Speaker 5:But you can still live the life you have.
Speaker 2:Bigfoot, but like I imagine, bigfoot probably so I can answer some of that for you okay, go for it as much as you can for all five contestants okay, so Bigfoot does forage for mushrooms I'm sure that some of those would include and he sells them. So, they probably do include some psychedelics. Does he partake, probably?
Speaker 3:Can't tell that you haven't tasted.
Speaker 4:Is he going to have a beer with me? Are we going to have a beer and talk about bot like botanicals and stuff.
Speaker 5:No, he brews his own. He's gonna be a pain in the ass.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly he's yeah, yeah, see just think of every hipster you've wanted to beat in the face with a fucking shovel man, what does mothman drink?
Speaker 4:what does mothman do? Smokes, crack smokes crack.
Speaker 5:I would like to think mothman is sober, like in my mind he's been a practicing mormon you know what? Okay, aside from the mormon one guy always warning you about your vices.
Speaker 4:If you take out like drugs and alcohol and you just replace it with collapsing bridges, you're not healthy.
Speaker 1:You ain't wrong, I'll give you that.
Speaker 2:I would say Mothman. He has a really good credit score 780, so he probably doesn't have that many vices. I think his only vice is just brooding about really, really dark stuff. Listening to.
Speaker 5:The Cure sitting in his room alone.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 5:Me and him are going to be friends. I know who my vote's going to be for.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I do kind of feel like Mothman would live a straight edge kind of life. Maybe he tried a couple of things in college college but it just wasn't for him. He didn't like the taste, he didn't like the smell and things like that. So he's just like it's just, but I don't think he would judge you for doing it. He was like, hey, just take it outside. I don't want the apartment smelling like that, you know I'm actually the reverse.
Speaker 5:I think he's never done anything and he's going to be smug and hold it over on you.
Speaker 1:Oh, like the Jersey Devil definitely is.
Speaker 3:I thought you said CM Park.
Speaker 5:And then telling you how you're doing it wrong.
Speaker 2:Yeah, jersey Devil, he's definitely a drinker, smoker he does pot. He does all the drugs, he knows everyone. I bet you he tried them all but he doesn't.
Speaker 1:I bet you he tried them all but he doesn't. I bet you he tried them all but he doesn't do them. He probably smokes like Newport 100s and drinks like stale, shitty, natty daddies and but he acts like he does all your other stuff, but he has no clue what he does. He goes oh man, I did so much coke last night I totally fell asleep. No, the fuck, you did. You know what you're talking about.
Speaker 5:I think we've all had that similar lie in high school.
Speaker 1:You guys can't tell I don't like the state of New Jersey.
Speaker 4:What about the Windingo?
Speaker 1:The Windingo.
Speaker 4:I don't know about that one. I don't know about the.
Speaker 1:Windingo, but I know about the Windigo.
Speaker 4:The Windigo whatever.
Speaker 3:Is it Windingo, the thing you used to call for movie times?
Speaker 2:That was good, that was very good.
Speaker 4:Very good, I think the Windigo is.
Speaker 2:I think the Windigo is pretty straight-laced. I mean, you know he's very into hiking, very into the woods, he's very communal. I think his only vice is eating questionable meat from questionable sources.
Speaker 1:Eating people. You know, eating people.
Speaker 5:I'm still confused about it. I didn't know his whole backstory had a lot to do with ice.
Speaker 4:Yeah, he's from the frozen north he's more straight, straight laced than say Bigfoot, right, what?
Speaker 5:about the.
Speaker 4:Chupacabra.
Speaker 5:Quinceañeras, you gotta go to church every Sunday.
Speaker 4:Quinceañeras.
Speaker 3:You know he's drinking the only thing that Chupacabra has qualms about is whether he's gonna pick Corona or Modelo.
Speaker 1:That's it. That's his biggest problem.
Speaker 5:Dos Equis right now my friend Dos Equis. Right now Exactly.
Speaker 3:The most interesting creature in the world.
Speaker 2:Exactly, oh, you beat me to it. You beat me to it.
Speaker 1:I don't always drink beer, but when I do, it's fucking goat's blood. Say thirsty, my friends. I don't always leave that in my fridge, but if I do, you don't touch them.
Speaker 4:That made my decision.
Speaker 5:Beer really.
Speaker 4:Oh, yeah, yeah, but I'm not into anything right now.
Speaker 1:I'm open to you know how do they feel about game nights?
Speaker 5:Oh, oh, that's a good one yeah. What kind of games would they play? Exactly Well, the.
Speaker 2:Jersey Devil devil, and remember I said he's very good at trivia night, so he's gonna, he's.
Speaker 5:I'm trying to think of some trivia games like trivial I feel like, because he is from jersey and a douchebag, it's not a trivia night he's gonna ask you a question and just tell you he's wrong. You, you know what I mean. Tell you you're wrong and then smash a beer on his head.
Speaker 1:Exactly, exactly, like exactly 100%. Nope, kevin Bacon was not on Footloose.
Speaker 5:Who's your favorite baseball team? Nah, that's stupid faggot. And then like smash a beer.
Speaker 1:I've known of you guys like that.
Speaker 4:Right, there's no actual conversation.
Speaker 3:Which one likes Naked Twister.
Speaker 2:Are you asking for a friend.
Speaker 3:No, I'm asking for me.
Speaker 1:I am me, I am friend.
Speaker 3:Depending on how unkempt the fur is, if it could feel uncomfortable on the nethers. Depending on what that spin arm lands on. I think the.
Speaker 2:Wendigo would be very into Naked Twister.
Speaker 3:Interesting, interesting. At least there's cooling action, which one gives out raccoons, which one gives out raccoons, which one's domesticating raccoons.
Speaker 2:That was Bigfoot, wasn't it?
Speaker 1:That was Bigfoot Bigfoot's got the army of raccoons. He's just going to show up like Kristoff from Frozen, but instead of little rock trolls, it's a bunch of fucking raccoons.
Speaker 2:I mean I'm not against that I'd see Bigfoot being down for game night. He'd be down for game night.
Speaker 5:Likes a good Uno game.
Speaker 3:I feel like, if he's like hipsters, it's going to be like he used a CNC set to create his own rare wood version of Settlers of Catan that he wants you to play on. And if you just approve the board game version.
Speaker 1:The Oregon Trail, the board game? No, I don't think that, oh my.
Speaker 4:God. Oh well, there is a card game, like a puzzle game, of the Oregon Trail. Yeah, that you can buy, yeah, but John, I don't think that's fair for you to be like, oh, hipster Portland, I think you know if maybe he drinks his own IPAs and you know his microdust and shrooms, maybe he just likes Uno.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because he's from fucking portland. We've been over this right. Do people from portland have like? Do they lean towards playing uno?
Speaker 1:I don't know well, yeah, because it's spicy, because it's a different language.
Speaker 3:So which which, by the way, some fucking tool came out with a version of uno in english that he sells and it is actually called one, and it's fucking, it's just it's horrible it's. I'm sorry you can.
Speaker 2:I want to say things that, but I won't have you seen the version of go fish called go fuck yourself wait, that's an actual game.
Speaker 1:I thought that was just how my family always played go fish yeah I was just like, oh cool, your thanksgivings are the same way. It's like hey dad, you got any sixes? Go fuck yourself, all right my bad.
Speaker 4:No, I don't go, fuck yourself go fuck yourself.
Speaker 1:you were a little prick. Thanks, Dad, I'll be back over here because I'm eight.
Speaker 4:So another note I have about the Mothman, though, is like under useful skills, because I was taking notes as you were reading this out and I was like paranoia is not a useful skill. You were like he's up all night looking out the window. That's not useful, that's weird, it's entertaining.
Speaker 3:It's weird until you're one of the only people that survives a government takeover of the country and no, no, but like as a normal, as a trust me, I've lived it as a normal person with roommates that have that tendency. That's not a fun thing as a normal person with roommates.
Speaker 4:That's not a fun trait to have in roommates.
Speaker 1:Exactly, but it's a giant fucking moth.
Speaker 4:So it's got to be a little entertaining.
Speaker 1:No, no, but it's a giant moth in your house, yeah, but it's paying right. It's got great credit score.
Speaker 4:No, but it's paying rent and it's got a great credit score.
Speaker 1:No, bigfoot's the best choice. Bigfoot's pretty solid. I'll give you that Because, like you said, he bruises on beer. He's definitely going to bruise on beer. Man, double IPAs all day, let's go.
Speaker 4:See that to me, but really it's the raccoon pet that sold it for me.
Speaker 3:OK, literally OK. I've been chasing OK story time, story time. I have been chasing this high for at least 15 years, if not 20. I used to work at Stanford and one of the doing like all sorts of extra stuff. I didn't have any like cool, I'm not a smart person, no professor or anything. I worked at facility stuff and we helped with the graduation every year and one of the things I did was drive people's elderly relatives to the individual graduations for their like's, like the school of engineering, the school of business, etc, etc. Because we were big ass fucking campus.
Speaker 3:Um, and so I'm driving this golf cart one day and this family gets in and out of the corner of my eye seeing small animal and I'm driving. I'm like, oh, I think I thought it was a puppy. I'm like, oh, can I see your puppy? And the person just goes sure and hands me a baby raccoon. That's fucking great. And I was like, oh my god. And I was so happy for that moment to hold that adorable baby raccoon that even holding my adorable own baby children has not brought me that joy. They're, they're listening and looking at me like what the fuck man children has not brought me that joy.
Speaker 3:That's me fair they're listening and looking at me like what the fuck man?
Speaker 1:And then you show them the pictures. It's a fucking baby, raccoon, don't be so goddamn modest.
Speaker 3:Don't be so vain. You think you're cuter than this? No, but seriously. Ever since then, I'm just like. I want a pet raccoon. I want to hold a raccoon. I want to go volunteer at the nature museum and feed the raccoon. It's just like.
Speaker 5:I love raccoons. Which primp foot is closest to Lenny from Of Mice and Men? Because I'm going to guess.
Speaker 1:John's Probably Bigfoot. That's got to be Bigfoot.
Speaker 3:Too many of those double IPAs and he's going to be snapping necks.
Speaker 1:Going to live off the fat of the land. John, Tell me about the rabbits. Tell me about the raccoons.
Speaker 3:Oh, I mean there's a couple of them. It's a hard choice. It's a hard choice for me.
Speaker 5:So do we do the Time House, have to come up with one, or do we all get our own?
Speaker 2:I think we all get our own. Yeah, this is an individual. We all get our own. I think I would get their own. You all get your own. Yeah, this is an individual.
Speaker 3:You get your own roommate. Oh, that's cool.
Speaker 2:This ain't New Girl.
Speaker 4:We're not all sharing an apartment.
Speaker 5:Yeah, well, I'll definitely vote out, john. If that was the case, you would do that out of spite every time. Anyway, who's left? Is it me? Everybody pick one already.
Speaker 4:Yeah, Bigfoot's my dog.
Speaker 3:I'm on the fence right now. I'm on the fence right now because I like Bigfoot for a couple reasons, but I also dislike Bigfoot for a couple reasons, but I also dislike Bigfoot for a couple reasons.
Speaker 5:Why do you hate Bigfoot?
Speaker 3:I fucking hate IPAs and everything about IPAs and the fact that IPAs exist and the fact that everybody loves them so much.
Speaker 5:I hate you. I'm not an IPA at all.
Speaker 1:We just assumed that he was making IPAs. We just assumed.
Speaker 4:John, just for the record. Yeah, I created that assumption.
Speaker 3:Oh, that wasn't an action. Okay, no.
Speaker 4:I created that assumption.
Speaker 5:Oh, okay.
Speaker 2:That was not in my research.
Speaker 3:No, got it, because I assumed that was something like he does the kombucha and the IPAs thing.
Speaker 5:I mean that's fine too. No, we'll just nickel fucking with you, oh shit.
Speaker 3:Alright, yeah, I think I'm going to go Bigfoot then.
Speaker 1:Fucking IPAs man.
Speaker 4:Also another big thing about Bigfoot is if he's going to have a dispute with the HOA. I'm all on board. I'm on the HOA all day.
Speaker 3:I do like a good throwdown with the HOA. I'm with you.
Speaker 4:I'll be petty with the HOA For sure.
Speaker 3:As much as I like, I like the Chupacabra too, but Bigfoot just kind of ekes him out of it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 5:Okay, I like that. That's valid. Alright we got two for.
Speaker 2:Bigfoot.
Speaker 5:Two for Bigfoot. Okay, I'm going with the Chupacabra. Not only is it, not only because I'm part Mexican, so we kind of have already a cultural understanding, but we both suck. That's a already a cultural understanding, but we both suck. So that's a big reason for it.
Speaker 5:I don't remember a lot of the ins and outs, but I guarantee you nobody's paying attention to us. Our credit is terrible. I'm just taking it. I would love to think of it for no other reason than I think I'll understand it more. Yeah, I'm not really sure what else to say, because in my mind my perfect roommate is everybody. That's not him. The way you describe everybody else. I'm like I either live with that guy or I know that guy and I hate that guy. It doesn't matter to me at all. I know it's not the most detailed explanation, but that's where I'm standing right now I love that his, his.
Speaker 1:The tip of the spear there for him was because he's mexican and sucks.
Speaker 2:That was great. All right, kyle, it's up to you Bring it home.
Speaker 1:Oh, it's my turn. Oh, wendigo, forever Hands down.
Speaker 2:Hands down Wendigo.
Speaker 1:Hands down. Wendigo, we're both cold, questionable meat choices. Lower that AC down like a mother. Totally fine, we're going hiking Very outdoorsy, very woodsysy. Just give us our cabin, leave us alone you know, past the spare ribs. Well, well, angie, who would you bunk with? Yeah, oh, oh man um oh, don't make it act like. Don't act like you don't know exactly who you're going to.
Speaker 2:Yeah, who? Okay, who do you think I'm going to say? Then, Kyle, Mothman. And do you know why I'm going to say Mothman?
Speaker 1:Am I allowed to say in front of these guys, or Absolutely.
Speaker 5:You do remember your Mothman. I do remember that episode, Mm yeah.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. There's one, Kyle, go ahead Say it.
Speaker 1:Oh, because Mothman's one of your hear-me-outs.
Speaker 5:Because Mothman was my first.
Speaker 1:Mothman's, one of your hear-me-outs.
Speaker 2:Because have you ever seen this statue of Mothman? Yeah, he's ripped he's ripped and he has an ass that you could bounce a quarter off of.
Speaker 5:You see, McFlannell faces the same though.
Speaker 1:I have no ass, I have zero ass.
Speaker 5:You have a weakness. I'm not going to exploit that.
Speaker 1:But I will.
Speaker 5:So Mothman, I do remember the Mothman statue. It's like a pro wrestler statue. You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:It's fucking nuts yeah it is absolutely ripped I gotta look this up of course you do.
Speaker 1:And there's I. While you're at it, look at lucifer. Yeah, wow with that statue.
Speaker 2:I don't understand why they put the ass that they did on that statue.
Speaker 3:But holy god, dude's got a it's it's it's, it's the perching, the perching on things and getting up those squats really work the glutes yeah, but that shit ain't flying.
Speaker 5:That shit's not flying. There's no way. I mean, it's shaped like a refrigerator, there's no. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:A lot of time under tension.
Speaker 4:Okay, let's point out the fact that she put together this whole hypothetical episode.
Speaker 5:Just to talk about how she must have.
Speaker 4:With all of these. With all of these very, very creative and very detailed and very beautifully written descriptions of a character.
Speaker 3:She built characters only to just be like I want Mothman's ass but to be fair, that's in lockstep with the rest of us going like the rest of us were. Just like IPA bad, I like Raccoon, yes well, he's half Mexican.
Speaker 5:Of course he's going to love the trip to California. We spent 45 minutes managing very eloquently, amazingly written.
Speaker 4:The descriptions were so eloquent.
Speaker 5:All of us stood back. Time Pal stood back and we're like, hey, this is an amazing written thing, only for Angie to be like, no, fuck you guys, I'm fucking that moth.
Speaker 2:I was taking notes.
Speaker 5:I'm just saying these are cryptids still.
Speaker 4:I was taking notes. I was taking notes. I've never taken notes, it's true, on any of the Time Pals podcasts. I've never taken notes, it's true.
Speaker 1:On any of the Time Pals podcast. I've never taken notes.
Speaker 4:But I was like okay, I gotta jot down these notes on the descriptions of each of these characters.
Speaker 1:They're taking it so serious.
Speaker 4:You can bounce a quarter.
Speaker 5:Nickel was texting me saying hey, what if I say this? What if I say that? What do you think? And I'm like I don't know where this is going. Man, do the best you can.
Speaker 4:That's a lie.
Speaker 5:That is a lie.
Speaker 1:They try to be so professional and respect the shit out of Angie and it's her turn. She goes. I want that moth dick that statue.
Speaker 3:Put some rust on those aluminum cheeks.
Speaker 5:Angie, nobody's stopping you from going there.
Speaker 2:I have gone there. I mean to the statue. How do you know, Did you finish? Did you finish? Every time A local?
Speaker 3:woman arrested for attaching phallus to a treasured statue God.
Speaker 4:Is that why you?
Speaker 5:called the black curtain, though, because we just shut the blinds and then the red mood lighting even a time pals episode oh christ.
Speaker 3:I just pictured that like no, no, no, open your eyes.
Speaker 2:I want the lights yeah, exactly yeah, it's the red mood lighting. I want the lights. Yeah, exactly yeah, it's the red.
Speaker 5:It's the red mood lighting, yeah, yeah I wouldn't bang my chupacabra, but I understand and just imagine after you're hot and sweaty he can just flap his wings to cool everything down. I mean what's going on? This is a roommate.
Speaker 1:This has become a very different episode.
Speaker 4:This is getting into a whole more complicated realm of like roommate versus like. Are we doing like?
Speaker 3:a new girl calm situation underscore. Bring something up the the paying of the rent like. According to what I've seen on the internet, apparently sex is a valid way to pay the rent.
Speaker 1:Yes, very, very true. Multiple times I've seen.
Speaker 5:So should you vote for a roommate? That's unfuckable.
Speaker 4:I mean do what you want.
Speaker 1:Same thing. I'm not banging the Wendigo, but like you know Valid question.
Speaker 5:To be fair, the Wendigo bangs you.
Speaker 1:Fair enough. Listen, all I'm saying is fair. The Wendigo bangs you. Fair enough. All I'm saying is the Wendigo on this list. All I'm saying is there's not a lot of crypts, that would we start putting Myth Monsters on there too. You throw Medusa on there. You know I'm going to get a shot. I'm going to get some blinders.
Speaker 3:At least you'll be hard with the Medusa.
Speaker 1:There you go For longer than four hours. I feel, like that.
Speaker 3:Wendigo, your last thought is just going to be like oh my god, is this what I've been doing to my flashlight?
Speaker 5:I just want to know how Angie's going to wrap this up, because I'm a monster.
Speaker 3:How do you?
Speaker 5:bring this back to the original point of the entire episode.
Speaker 2:I don't know, you just go original form of the entire episode I don't know.
Speaker 3:I just you should just hit the hang up button.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like, well, I think that does it for this episode.
Speaker 3:Do the crackle like you're crunching a paper. Oh sorry, we're breaking up right now. I guess we gotta disconnect.
Speaker 4:I don't know what to do. I'll just do the.
Speaker 2:Irish goodbye and just hang up, yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, it happened one time because I lost my internet.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I could always say I lost my internet.
Speaker 1:Hey.
Speaker 2:What. Don't give me that shit, don't give me that shit don't give me that.
Speaker 5:One time happens one time so who wins angie and why is it us?
Speaker 2:who wins? I think you all are winners. You came out of this experiment with um very, very wonderful new roommates. I think you all are winners.
Speaker 1:In a brand new way to see Angie, or just like wow.
Speaker 2:And you got to know me in a very weird way, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 4:So just to be clear, who did everyone pick? I picked.
Speaker 5:Bigfoot Chupacabra for me, wendigo.
Speaker 4:And then Mothman, and then Mothman. She told us she was mid-drag of a fucking cigarette there the.
Speaker 1:Jersey Devil Not bad.
Speaker 5:Mothman, I will never judge you. For whatever you're into, I should have guessed that a podcast about horror would be terrifying at some point in time for me, look my other hear-me-out is Pyramid Head. It's like Mothman and Pyramid Head. My other hear-me-out is Pyramid Head, famously as a giant ass.
Speaker 2:How about that Bob Pyramid?
Speaker 1:Head has a giant everything.
Speaker 2:Pretty sure.
Speaker 1:Overcompensation.
Speaker 2:I don't know all those, all those nurses like to get deboned by him no, no no they get reboned by him. If you think about it, true hey yo, alright, I'm gonna wrap this up. Do I hear crows? Hey yo, all right, I'm going to wrap this up. Do I hear crows? Is that an?
Speaker 3:omen. Yeah, no, no, our new house literally is in the middle of the fucking woods with a murder of crows. He's trying to meet one of these. This is not a murder of crows. This is a genocide of crows. There are so many fucking crows.
Speaker 4:This is a genocide of crows there are so many fucking crows.
Speaker 3:They are like two, three hundred crows all throughout this neighborhood.
Speaker 4:I am so glad it's you having bird sounds instead of me this time.
Speaker 3:Oh, I love it. I love it, I'm happy about it.
Speaker 1:Murder of crows. It's a genocide that was good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that was good, all right, well. Well, there you have it five cryptids, five terrible roommates and zero hope of ever coming back from this episode. Time pals, it's been great having you here. We've had a blast. I hope you guys have had fun and we. We should get together and do this again sometime. Remember to follow the Time Pals as well. Come over and give them some love and some follows on their podcast. Be sure to like and share and tell your friends about us. We need comments, we need ratings. Feel free to follow us on all social medias and, um, yeah, I think that's it.
Speaker 5:Peace out yeah, it's underscore for the time. Pals and john and nickel, thank you very much for having us. Obviously, you guys are invited anytime you guys want. We always enjoy you. And I have a brand new perspective on Angie somehow. So we're going to have to come up with a different non-sexual episode, but it'll be good, we'll talk. We'll talk.
Speaker 1:We'll sexualize it, don't worry.
Speaker 2:I guarantee you yes, alright, say bye Kyle.
Speaker 1:Bye Kyle, bye Kyle.
